I know it hasn’t been that long since I last posted something on the blog, but a few days ago was my 20th birthday (Probably some of you thought I was older, but no, I’m 20.) and I thought that since now I’ve reached this age, I should do a ’20 Things I’ve Learnt In 20 Years’ post for you all because I figured it would be something interesting for me to talk about and also I hope it can teach some people some new things as well. So here are 20 things I’ve learnt in 20 years (This will be long, so get yourself some food and drink for this one).
- Live life to the fullest. – You only live once and you don’t want to be one of those people who spent their entire lives not being able to do things that you’ve never been able to do for any reason that holds you back from doing what you want to do. There are many things you can do to live your life. Things such as: Learning new things, Seeing new things and going on new adventures, Finding a new hobby, Facing your fears, etc. There is so many things you can do that you can think of and it doesn’t have to be something that you can do on your own. You can do it with family, friends, a lover, a group of people or you can do it by yourself if you feel like you can. Just go for it.
- Try to get out of negative environments (As much as you can). – This is something I always try to do, but when there are negative people around you, you can’t help but feel that negative energy from them. One thing I do is try and find positivity in just about everything. These days it’s not that easy to find, but one thing that’s always easy is to surround yourself with things you love and people you love and care for (Who help bring that positive energy) to help you in that space and maybe it can help you bring that energy to others, hopefully. (I feel like I never say things right, so do forgive me if I don’t make sense.)
- Normal is boring. – Especially when you’re like me and you always get called ‘Weird’ by everyone around you, it does make you wonder what normal is in this world. To be honest, these days I don’t even know what ‘Normal’ is to a person, but I’ve heard many people say that normal is boring and in my opinion, I think that’s very true for certain reasons, like the fact that you can’t express yourself in your own way when you’re too normal. That’s how I see it, but some of you may see it a different way. But I did see so many people embrace being different than ‘Normal’ and it’s made me embrace that about myself. So be you and if people call you weird, tell them that normal is boring.
- Your body, use it, because someday you will lose it. – This is a quote that I’ve heard on a workout app (That’s no longer available anymore) and basically it’s to do with getting on your feet and doings things with yourself that can make you say that you’ve done something and it’s best to get out there and do stuff (Including work outs) because you don’t want to be close to you final days of living and thinking to yourself that you haven’t lived a day in your life or worked hard on yourself to keep going in life because that’s not worth it. Plus working out is good for you too and there are many facts and reasons for it too. (I’m not making a list for you all on here since this isn’t that kind of list.) So get yourself doing things and also get your work out on when you can.
- You will go through bad experiences in life, but soon they’ll lead you to something better. – Yes, we all go through bad times in life, but let’s be honest. They make us who we are and they are the reason we get to better things in the future. I know if I didn’t go through what I went through when I was 18, I’d never be a Professional Wrestler. So remember that bad times will end and they’ll lead you to better place.
- Be happy with everything you still have in life, because they all might be gone soon. – There is one saying that goes, “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” and that is actually a true saying, for some people. But you should always be happy with what you have in life before you don’t have anymore, no matter who you are, because it will soon be gone (Except for the bad things, which then you can throw out for good). So in life we have people in our lives, but they don’t always stick around physically for many reasons. One reason can be that someone lost their life and while that means that they’re physically not around, they are still around spiritually, but it’s a bit different at first, but soon you get use to it and they’re still in your hearts forever. Another reason can be that they walk out on you and the main difference with that is they’re no longer in your life for whatever reason there is or if there isn’t a reason and they’re just stupid enough to. So do make sure that you do hold onto those who are closest to you and those who will always have your back and never abandon you, and if they die, you’ll still have memories of them everywhere you go.
- Don’t keep important things from people because one day it will save a life. – Out of all of the things I’ve put down so far, this has to be the most important one in my opinion. This isn’t really something I just share to anyone, unless I was asked, but I was once a victim of a crime a number of years ago and I never did anything about it until a couple of years after it happened when I confessed to my mum at a funeral. Yes, that really did happen and I have no clue how it did happen, but it turns out I confess random things out of nowhere when I grieve. Not sure if anyone else does that too, but I really do that apparently. But then nothing was dealt with until nearly 4 years after I confessed when it was brought up again after I posted on Facebook about it (My personal profile, not my Facebook page) and then I got to file a report about it and now I know that I’ll make sure no one else goes through what I went through, and one thing I have to say to anyone who has also been in the same position as me and been a victim of a crime, tell someone, like a family member, a friend, make a video and post it on Social Media or YouTube, or even file a report, because it really will save lives and prevent anything bad from happening to other people who may become victims too.
- Never let things in life ruin your life. – As a person who has had Depression for a number of years, I’ve had things in life try to ruin it and there actually are many that I went through. One of the things is the ‘Being a victim of a crime’ thing (That is mentioned on #7), which I’m still going through that, but while it has prevented me from getting out of the house on my own for certain reasons, I can still do wrestling because it’s like I’m someone else when I’m in the ring compared to everyday life. Another example that I did go through is one of my ex-boyfriends wasting 3 months of my life by being with me and then I got to see his true colours, which that almost ruined my relationship with my family, but gladly I don’t see him again and I’m glad about that or else I wouldn’t be a wrestler. Basically I’m trying to say that if you’re in a kind of relationship that’s falling apart or if you’ve been through a traumatic experience, don’t let it ruin you and overcome it.
- Not everything in life goes according to plan, but there is still time to make new plans. – There is always expectations and realities in everything. Sometimes they can be the same and sometimes they can be different. But there is always a Plan B for when something doesn’t go according to plan. One example: You have a dream job that you’ve wanted for years, but you don’t know if you’ll get it, even if you’ve worked hard for it, you should always have a backup plan for when that plan doesn’t turn out the way you want, such as thinking of another dream to make come true or see what other options there are around the thing you wanted to do first. But remember, Plan Bs can work for just about everything, like starting a family, which there’s many options for that. Not sure what else there is, but there is many ideas for Plan Bs for sure.
- Learn to expect the unexpected. – I’ve been through many things in life, as someone who has been alive for 2 decades now, but growing up, so many things were just so unexpected for me. Like the time I thought I would be in an all girl’s Secondary School that nearly all of my female friends from Primary School were going to, but I didn’t get in and I didn’t expect that, other than the fact that someone who I spent the whole day at that school with thought I was awkward in many ways because I use to have different ways of doing things compared to everyone else, but I thought they would’ve got over it, but they never do because they think it lacks manners. (WTF?) There was also times when people would come up out of nowhere, which that is actually normal. But when it comes to things like if you’ll be accepted into a school or something like that, do remember to prepare yourself for a good result and a bad result. Well, that’s something I would do, but probably other people do it as well. Who knows?
- You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince (or princess). – Okay, first off, I didn’t add the princess bit to make any of you think I’m revealing that I’m Bisexual or anything like that, which I’m definitely 100% Heterosexual. But I put both ‘Princess’ and ‘Prince’ for any Homosexuals, Bisexuals, Pansexuals, etc. Yes, I am an LGBTQ Supporter and I happen to know those who are part of the LGBTQ Community (Mainly Homosexuals, Bisexuals and Transgenders). Anyway, this is something I’ve been told many times when it came to finding a new lover someday. If I have to be honest, I’m not the luckiest with guys, especially since there are the bad boy kind out there and I (Like an idiot) fell for them, because I use to think that good boys were boring during my early and mid-teen years and I always got told that I have to kiss a lot of frogs before I find my prince and hopefully that’s true, so I know that you can follow this rule as well.
- Accept what you can’t change. – Before I was always told that if there’s something I don’t like, I can change it. Well that’s the case with some things, like my hair colour, the clothes I wear, etc. While with things like eye colour, my Autism, the fact that I sound like a teenager, etc. I couldn’t change. But it did take me a while to accept what I can’t change (It only took a bit of maturing to help me) and sometimes things in life hurt, but I did get over it and realised that people do like some of the things that I do have and it made me accept those things too. That and seeing people with features that are identical to mine and embracing what they have. So yes, even someone like me has inspirations.
- Everything in life is a learning experience. – Before you ask, yes, everything is a learning experience, whether it’s stuff you learn in school, college or university, stuff you learn when you start a new job or anything else in everyday life. I actually didn’t know about this at first, but after hearing people say, “You learn something new everyday.”, it made a whole lot more sense. I’ve even learnt a lot from wrestling, such as the fact that it’s not only about knowing moves and how to do them right, but it’s a whole lot more than that. I could talk about that, but I always say that this isn’t a wrestling blog. But yeah, you learn something new everyday and everything is a learning experience. Remember that.
- Help is there for you when it comes to everything. – Some people may not know this, but when it comes to help, it is always there when you need it. I may have denied it at times when there’s no need for it, but when I did, I definitely did.
- Respect is earned, not given. – Even in the wrestling business, this is something that is very important and even I had to learn that in every single way possible. Since I don’t know much to say on this one (Because I can’t think of anything at the moment), but do remember this if you want to get somewhere.
- Lookout for either danger or a sign of bad vibes from people before finding them out from other people. – This one may sound stupid, but I have been around bad people before and they’re really bad influences, whether or not they do have their reasons. I mean if it’s because they’ve been through stuff in their life that made them like that, it is best to influence them to be better and help them overcome anything. As for someone who’s like that because they think it’s cool or whatever, definitely stay away from them, because I don’t like people who try to act hard or anything like that because they think it’s cool. To be honest, it’s not and I suggest you don’t do it, and if you have done it, re-evaluate your life.
- Starving yourself isn’t the answer to weight loss. – Even though I probably don’t look like it, I did use to starve myself to try and lose weight and let me say that it’s not been my best plan when I decided to not even eat to lose weight. Yes, I did have a bit of an eating disorder, but it was in Secondary School. At the time I went through a lot of stress over stuff in school and also my friends would always tell me that I needed to lose a lot of weight if I wanted to be a wrestler, so because I never went to a gym at the time, I had to eat very little everyday and that didn’t last long because I soon got really hungry and ended up being fed a lot of things I liked and I was fine again and I was told starving myself isn’t the safest answer to weight loss, neither is it the right answer to weight loss.
- Focus on what’s most important to you. – The reason why I put this down is because I’ve had times in my life where I made other things more important than what I really want. One time was when I was 18, I was in a dysfunctional relationship where everything was all about him. Literally it wasn’t 50/50 and because I was blinded by him, I thought I wanted a future with him, but realizing the kind of person he is made me realize what I really want. So I’m glad I’ve learnt from my biggest mistake in my life.
- Being around boys doesn’t make you a boy. Well, physically that is. – Growing up with older brothers and being the only girl in a class many times does do an affect on a girl, but one thing’s for sure is that it doesn’t make any girls who hang with the boys a boy themselves. (Not sure if I said that right.) Yes, even I was called a boy when I was in school and I felt offended by that because it was something I wasn’t and these days I wanted to kick blokes in the balls and pull girls’ hair to make them see what a ‘real man’ is. I may not be transgender, but at least I can do it like blokes can, except stuff like peeing while standing up and stuff like that. I can’t do that.
- When you want some things done, you have to do it yourself. – Now this is definitely something I’ve learnt from school and college. Before I’d always tell people off, but only 2/10 times it’s dealt with while 8/10 times teachers would do fuck all about it unless it’s to do with me somehow. (Life of a Special Needs School kid.) So soon I learnt to deal with my shit myself and even when people say, “Tell someone and we’ll deal with it.”, I never believed them because they never did. I’m no tattletale or anything like that. It’s basically how it is for me.
And that is 20 things. I know it’s not the best list, but I’m not the best blogger. So there you go.